Finally Feeling the Rewards

I had not blogged here for AGES..........life with Sam had felt so mundane recently I couldn't bring myself to write abt him after facing him day in day out day in day out day in day out!!!!

Just 3 nights ago I had felt depressed with having to do the same bedtime ritual - get him to keep his toys, sit on the toilet bowl, clean up after his poop, brush his teeth without playing with water, change into his pyjamas, read to him, lie in the dark next to him till he falls asleep - night after night after night with no way out and no life of my own!!

But tonight something happened to make me feel that all my sacrifices ARE going somewhere, as some of my colleagues sincerely reassure me: Sam sang to me a song that I've read/sang to him as part of the bedtime ritual! And he did it without any prompting, just out of the blue, when I was changing him into his pyjamas!

It was "5 Little Ducks", and though Sam's pronouciation is atrocious, the tune is off, he missed out whole sentences, and didn't even start with the correct number, I'm still very proud of him!!!!



I had not even realised Sam could now indicate numbers easily on his right hand!

Oh, I'm so glad that all these nightly efforts to read to him are paying off in some way, even if his recognition of the alphabet is still way off. At least he's remembering something!

This is probably the kind of bonding in Sam's early years that my colleagues had reassured me would last till adulthood...............at least now I don't feel like I've been wasting my time & effort & sacrificing my nightlife for nothing!!!

My 1st Evening Out

This evening was the 1st time in 3 years I got to spend the evening out, without Sam. In order to make it for my company's Social Nite - Tiger Brewery tour, followed by food & free-flow beer - hubby had agreed to try to make it back home earlier. In-laws also agreed to help fetch Sam from school & feed him dinner. I had planned to be back home by 8:30pm latest, so that I could put Sam to bed for the night. So everything seems well planned & easy, right???

I didn't realise I had been unconsciously stressed out. Last night, I actually had a nightmare: dreamt that Sam caught stomach flu again........my right arm was holding Sam over the bathroom basin, where he was vomitting into, my left cradling the phone, informing the office I couldn't make it for the brewery tour after all.

Isn't it pathetic that I can't even go out to enjoy myself in peace?????? The nightmare had left a bad taste in my mouth: I spent my day checking my hp in case the school called to ask me to bring Sam home for whatever kind of emergency my imagination could come up with.

Still, I'm so glad I did manage to go. It was irritating to have to wolf down 10 finger food sized sandwiches & down half a mug of beer in 20 min, so that I could go off without a hungry stomach, but it was nice to be able to go for the tour & enjoy the company of fellow colleagues. They're such a fun bunch. I can't wait for the Malacca holiday.........assuming Sam would stay healthy, of course!

Over-Controlling Mum?

I got a shock yesterday when I went to pick up Sam from childcare & found him munching on - of all things - a prawn cracker. I was so stunned, I didn't dare ask the teacher why Sam was eating such an unhealthy snack. I was afraid I would have sounded too harsh & unreasonable, and should that offering be from a parent, instead of the teacher, it would have been rather embarassing.

So by this morning when I'm able to blog about this topic sensibly, I was thinking more along the lines of "am I being too paranoid?" instead of "how to stop my son from eating unhealthy foods?". After all, I'm an avid snacker myself. Though only God knows the lengths I've gone to to prevent my son seeing me eat potato chips, chocolates & potato chips.

So why on earth should I try stopping my son from eating all the 'interesting' foods???? I might as well enjoy sharing the snacks with him, right, just as my own mother does with me. The thing is, my mummy didn't start fighting with me over bags of potato chips till I was in adulthood, earning sufficiently to support our eating habits.

Sam is only 3 years old, and usually refuses to eat vegetables & fruits. I've a hard enough time trying to get him eat balanced meals so that I won't have to resort to popping more health supplements into him (already he's eating Vit C tablets). I don't want to affect his appetite with all these junk foods. Already I'm compromising by reducing his dinner portions (by 2 spoonfuls) so that he could eat his fav biscuits or ice cream as a reward for completing the meal.

And for that matter, surely there're healthier snacks than prawn crackers????? I'm not even talking about raisins (believe me I've tried, but Sam just spat out the raisins after giving them a good chew), or similarly healthy snacks all the magazines I read agree to be good for children. I'm talking about snacks with some kind of nutrients inside them: flavoured breakfast cereals such as CoCo-Crunch, chocolate-flavoured oatmeal balls (from Quaker), Hi-iron/calcium biscuits, candy laced with vit C & made with fruit juices. With such choices in the market, why do people like my in-laws still want to buy gummies with nothing in them except sugar & artificial flavourings??????

Am I being too uptight over a minor matter??????????

A Funeral Wake

Maternal grandmother passed away on Wed night. Today was the funeral wake. And it was so bloody difficult to feel sad properly when half of me was constantly worried about Sam shrieking in the middle of the funeral. Why can't the boy keep still for an instant???? If I had known he was going to be so difficult I wouldn't have brought him along on Sat night. Then maybe he wouldn't be overtired and be easier to control this morning. Men are so useless when it comes to babysitting, can't even keep the little bugger from running around in the funeral.

CCC Closed!

Turns out that Sam's childcare centre would be closed today, cos as many as 28 students and 5 teachers are down with stomach flu!!!!!! So they're closing for disinfection. So Sam can't go to school today after all.................I was still contemplating yesterday night on letting go in the afternoon for the cookie baking. Well, that's totally out to the question now.

Furthermore, I now would have to bring Sam back to the doctor for a follow-up, to obtain a certificate stating Sam is fit for returning to school, cos of the spread of the stomach flu in the CCC. Sigh!!! I do dislike going to the family clinic, cos there's always a risk of infection there. Oh well, what to do???

Am getting sick & tired of facing Sam at home. Luckily I had a store of library books from last week's visit, and had just found a new Korean drama - style - to watch, so am managing to amuse myself when Sam is napping.

Still, Sam is getting ridiculously rude to his grandparents when he spends so much time at home. I'm really at a loss of how to get him to learn good manners. After facing him for the past 2 days I'm now just trying to spend as much time away from him as possible. If I have to play cars with him again I'll probably blow up again! Can't wait for tomorrow to go shopping with hubby!!!!!

Updates

Realised I haven't updated this blog for some time. Well, the fact is, I didn't really wanna be a mother for the past few weeks, so was definitely not in the mood to talk about my son anywhere. :P

What happened was, barely one week after Sam recovered from HFMD, he came down with flu, this time, with a sudden onset of fever of 39degC. Both his Dr Ong & I agreed Tamiflu wasn't necessary, so Sam just got the normal course of antibiotics, but his fever took several days to subside.

At one point, his fever refused to come down even after taking Paracetemol. I got so worried, I cancelled my assignment at the last minute & actually packed my bags in case we had to rush Sam down to the hospital in the middle of the night.

Fortunately that wasn't necessary. And Sam's fever finally stayed away on the 4th day of the antibiotics course. And he recovered just in time for our holiday to KL...........it was a close call, we were contemplating cancelling the holiday, in fact.

Anyway, last week Sam made it back to school for the entire week without falling sick. I've been dosing him with Vit C & herbal teas.........if by next week he's still strong & healthy, he would have passed a milestone, ie. 2 weeks in school without falling ill. So me keeping my fingers crossed..........

Sam's Cleared!

Yes! Sam is cleared of HFMD and can go to school tomorrow!!!! Hip hip hoorah!!!!!!!

Me have been planning what to do tomorrow since yesterday. Can't wait for Sam to go to childcare tomorrow, then I'll be free to go eat my fav pork cutlet at Tonkichi in Ngee Ann City, buy hubby's fav tomato bread, and perhaps visit the new Ion!

Ah! It's been a torturous week............esp. last Thurs night when Sam's fever peaked just below 39 degC, and Friday when his whole mouth was painful from the ulcers & couldn't eat and needed to be persuaded to drink his milk.

I'm only grateful this time he caught a mild strain, and thus didn't have full blown ulcers on his hands, feet & diaper area, just a few red spots. Oh, please don't ever let Sam catch HFMD again!!!!

Hanging On......

I'm gonna lose my sanity if this goes on. Already I've lost my temper at Sam yesterday night, after trying the whole day to get him to drink water. I've cajoled, coaxed, threatened (with scoldings, toys, & pain) and scolded him, and with exception to the last method, each time he would only take ONE sip of water.

I know it's painful for him to even drink water, but I can't possibly risk him getting dehydrated right???? Esp. if his fever just subsided! And it was with promises of ice cream (which in the end he only ate half a scoop) did he finish his regular sized mashed potato from KFC.

Later I'm gonna get more of the mashed potato, and also some baby food. Think that's all he can tahan to eat now, since it doesn't require chewing & hence less likely to trigger the pain in various parts of his mouth, though no matter what, it'll be painfuil for him the moment he swallows.

Irritating thing is, though Sam finds it difficult to swallow, he certainly has no problem screaming. Now he even cuts back on his speech & goes moaning all day long, but when things don't go his way, he still finds it okay to scream shrilly. And now he'll cry (complete with tears, red nose, & mucus) at the drop of the pin. It's driving me nuts!!!!!!

Getting Worse.......

Sam's fever got higher today. Refused to go down past the 38 degC mark. If it gets higher than 39 degC I'm gonna call the doc, cos he did assure me yesterday that only a mild fever is to be expected.

In the morning Sam was still quite okay: finished a whole piece of bread with egg mayo at 10 am, and willingly ate 5 cocktail sausages while waiting for his noodles. The problem came after his nap, his ulcers spread to his tongue and the side of his mouth (probably cos of his thumb sucking). By dinnertime he found it painful to eat solid foods, and I spent half an hour cajoling him to eat one slice of potato with his fav Yakult.

Can only hope now that this is the worst that he would be facing, cos I don't want him to find it painful to even drink. At least now he's willing to drink his "Ding Dang" & Ribena. Me considering making him banana milkshake tomorrow.......perhaps letting him try KFC's mashed potato.......anything to fill his little tummy!

Why So Much Junk Food?????

I don't understand why on earth Singaporean parents like to give their children junk food to bring to school. I never had such problems when Sam was in KL with all the expatraite parents of various nationalities.

My complaint? Sam had a 'picnic' in school the Friday past. We parents were told we can pack some snacks for the picnic, for the children to eat in addition to their usual teabreak food prepared by the school.

Well, I packed some Ritz biscuits, which were not totally consumed by the kids, cos they have more interesting goodies, including Oreos and jelly. I only know of these 2 items cos Sam had Oreo crumbs on his mouth when I came to fetch him, and his classmates were still popping the jelly directly from the containers.

Thanks to the apparently totally unhealthy picnic, Sam lost his appetite for dinner that night. At night he complained of a slight stomachache, and continued to have bloated stomach all of next day, ie. yesterday. By nighttime I realised he had a low fever, which fortunately subsided after 1 dose of medicine at night and doesn't not appear to be the onset of the HMFD that's spreading in his school.

Really, why must Singaporean parents give such unhealthy foods for snacks??? Admittedly, my Ritzs weren't terribly healthy either, but at least I try not to give Sam all-chocolate biscuits, and the jelly I buy for him are the Japanese konnyaku ones that claim to contain fibre & real fruit juice. I myself even cut down on my fav potato chips in an attempt not to let him eat so much of the titbits.

That's not the only example of unhealthy snacking. For my Friday's tour, the primary school specifically asked not to have the break in MacDonald's, and the students are to bring their own snacks.

Well, the teacher-in-charge boarded the bus with a large plastic bag full of Mamee, which he distributed out to the students even before we reach the destination! So during breaktime, the students ended up buying & eating Pocky and potato chips. What's the point of not going to MacDonald's then???????

Really, why can't the children of today snack on buns, cakes & sandwiches like I used to when I was their age??? I'm not even asking for healthier choices like apples & other fruits. Even if we mums are too busy to pack a cooked lunch for our children like what they do in other countries, there're always healthier snacks available.

I now recall a boy from another tour - also Primary 4 - where he chose to eat the peanut butter sandwich his mother packed for him, & exchanged part of his meal with a friend who was packed CoCo Crunch. And get this, they were having their break in MacDonald's, where his classmate ate 2 Fillet 'o' Fish in the 20 min break! Now I can only hope that I can manage to bring Sam up to like the healthy foods too when he's older!!!

Would Sam Catch HFMD?

Had been near impossible to blog with Sam around the house. Yesterday had finally sent him back to childcare after 4 days at home, mainly cos I had to work in the afternoon.

Otherwise, the teacher had actually advised keeping Sam at home till he doesn't require any medication, cos the centre had confirmed its 1st case of Hand Foot Mouth Disease on Monday, and children with weakened immunity system are thus encouraged to refrain from going to school.

So now I'm starting to behave like a paranoid mum, checking Sam constantly for any signs of fever, trying to guess if his refusal to finish his breakfast is a sign of impending illness, or if he's just being difficult.

Most irritating is that his phlegm still hasn't cleared after 5 days of medication. Fortunately it seems to be thinning. I don't want to have to bring Sam to the doctor again for antibiotics, though I'm sorely tempted to do so, just so that he would recover faster and I wouldn't have to worry like that.

And I know my worries are in part on behalf of myself, cos if Sam gets HFMD and can't go to school, I'll have trouble going to work, which is all the more important to me in the next 2 weeks as I have 3 assignments & also training for the HeritageFest tour. My in-laws can't be relied on taking care of troublesome Sam for an entire day, my mum just recovered from flu herself, and there's always the danger of passing the HFMD to Tiffany, who fell sick earlier this week too.

Maybe tomorrow I should go temple to 拜拜, just for ease of mind & to pray for patience to stop myself going paranoid!

Sick..........Again!

Yes, Sam is ordered home rest, yet again!!!!!!!

Yesterday Sam started coughing. Could hear the phelgm all stuck in his throat. And we were both kept awake at night by his coughing. So this morning I whisked him off to Dr Ong again.

And now I'm to keep Sam homebound for the rest of the week. Upon hearing my groan, Dr Ong agreed Sam could go back to school if his cough stops.

So now, I'm stuck with Sam for the next 2 days. Keeping my fingers crossed that he'll recover sufficiently to go back to childcare by Thursday, cos I don't think I'll be able to tahan having him home all day for so long!!! Besides, I still have my MINDEF tour this Friday to prepare for...............provided that didn't get cancelled in the last minute again!

On a lighter note, hubby has finally succumbed and bought his MacBook, so now I have this Acer all to myself. ;) Planning to rip out all my fav songs so that can listen from the hp. Also have to clear out all the old photos & videos of Sam from my hp & upload onto the net. Plenty to do while catching up on my fav dramas!! ;)

To Go Or Not To Go

This H1N1 flu pandemic is starting to drive me crazy. All simply because Sam is due for his 2nd Hep B vaccine shot..........last Wednesday. I forgot to bring him for the shot over the weekend, and had planned to do so tomorrow, fetching him earlier from childcare.

Now, I'm starting to worry if it's a good idea to expose Sam to the dangers of the family clinic. What if he caught a flu bug there while waiting to take the vaccine??????

Considering the option of bringing him all the way to the paediatrician for the shot. At least there he won't be exposed to sick adults.

Hubby wondering if the 2nd shot can be delayed. But with the H1N1 spreading locally, I doubt if the booster shot can wait for another 6 months.

Equally irritating is the fact that Sam seems to be having a sensitive nose. He's been waking up in the morning with a slight blocked nose, which goes down his throat and causes him to cough - 2 ~ 3 times - after he wakes up. If it's because of the aircon, then why does he appear to be fine in the airconditioned childcare centre or in the shopping centres???? Past few days had given him the running nose medicine, now not sure if that's a good idea. Sigh! if Sam is having running nose & not sensitive nose then maybe he should not be taking the booster shot now.

UUURRRGGGHHHH!!!!!!!

When Sam is An Angel.......

I must blog this, so that in future when I'm in any doubt, or when Sam behaves like a devil (again), I have something to remind me that there ARE times when he behaves like an angel instead..............

Sam's been very sticky to me this week. As hubby said, he's always gotten very sticky to me when he just started school.

There's been frequent declarations of affections to me from Sam recently, one of my fav being: "Mummy happy, Sam happy!" which I choose to intepret as "when mummy is happy, Sam will be happy too!"

But today Sam surpassed himself. We were on our way home from childcare when I pointed out a Toyota Corolla Altis to him.

Sam: Sam earn money, Sam buy Toyota Corolla.

Me: Good.

Sam: Mummy buy Corolla.

Me (with fake frown): Mummy don't earn enough money, Mummy cannot buy big car.

Sam: Sam earn money, Sam buy big car Mummy.

Oh, I was so happy to hear this!!!!!!

I wonder if he would still remember this when he grows up. ;P

Plasters, Band-aids, whatever

Today saw another advert for cute cartoony plasters. Everytime I see one of these ads, or see the actual product on the shelves, I can't help but pause & seriously consider buying a box.

But I dare not.

I read somewhere that a mummy would bring such a box on long plane journeys to entertain her young children. How I wish I have the courage to try this trick.

Reason????

Cos Sam already loves plasters. The plain brown ones, the tranparent waterproof ones, he actually enjoys having one stuck on his little body.

Whenever he has a cut, or had scratched a mosquitoe bite till the skin broke, I would put a plaster over the wound, changing it daily.

And Sam would always eagerly stick out his arm or leg or whichever part that requires the attention, pointing out the wound, telling me to be careful. He would try to help remove the packaging from the plaster itself, ask to stick on the plaster (which I don't allow of course), and happily help throw away the resulting rubbish.

On the day I proclaim the wound healed and the services of the plaster not required further, Sam would cry & lament & kick up a fuss, insisting a new plaster be placed. I sometimes find it more traumatic to stop putting the plaster than dealing with the wound!!!!

Hence I definitely do not dare buy the cute & fanciful plasters that tug at my heart. It is difficult enough resisting Sam's attraction to the plain drabby ones already!

Stuck at Home. Again!

Sigh!!! After a mere one week in childcare, Sam has been ordered to stay at home by his doctor, to make sure his 2-wk long running nose gets a chance to fully recover.

So now I'm also stuck at home with the playful little bugger. :(

There goes my plans to meet friend today. To go shopping tomorrow.

Worse still, I'm also having flu myself. :(

Sigh! Can't wait for Sam to go back to school next week!!!!!!

Sam in Childcare

Finally have time to blog about Sam in childcare.

Me have spent the 1st 3 days of this week in & near the childcare centre, going back frequently to check on his progress. Today is the 1st day I'm letting Sam spend the whole day there, from taking the school bus there in the morning, till abt 5 pm later.

Actually I also dunno why I'm so worried. Guess it was because of the not-so-good experiences in the past.

Cos turns out that Sam LOVES the new place. In particularly the toys.

He may leave me crying, but it takes a lot of persuasion to get him to agree to go home in the last 2 days, when I went to fetch him at 5pm.

Here's a video to share, of Sam playing with his fav toy, the tricycle, on the very 1st day of school on Monday. He spent >1hr on the tricycle, refusing the enticement of other toys.



I guess I'm lucky that Sam took to the teachers there well too. I was rather surprised, & very pleased, that he allowed the teachers to bathe & feed him, and also put him to nap. So now I'm not really worried about his time in the childcare centre.

Well, now only worrying about how much he's eating there, cos he seems to want to spend all his time playing & is being so picky about his food.

Still, at this rate, I may remain hopeful about him going to school in the morning in a willing & happy mood very soon, instead of the teary farewells I've come to dread.

Starting Full Day Childcare Tomorrow

In a dramatic turn of events, I received a phone call in the middle of our shoe-shopping, informing me that the childcare centre has finally received their permit & hence can start operations tomorrow.

So instead of spending my time planning my week ahead, I ended up spending my afternoon putting Sam's school bag together. And since Sam loves to peel off stickers, I crazily stuck stickers ALL over his bag, plastic bags, toothbrush, mug etc.

Hubby commented it was lucky we've just found a new pair of shoes for Sam this morning, JIT for his school. Truely, it's almost a miracle Sam was in a shoe-buying mood, and a covered-toe version to boot. Oh, it's a bit irritating that his version of Crocs actually costs more than mine, but well, I was gratified he could actually put it on & off all by himself, and seems to enjoy wearing it so much. Hubby was simply pleased he doesn't have to see a 4th incarnation of the Clarks sandals Sam was so fond of.

Now, I'm trying to rest & relax as much as it's motherly possible with Sam in the house, cos the next few days are gonna be tough. For me! Already I'm trying to imagine how it's possible for me to go off for a decent lunch...........

One Week of School Holidays to Bear

Sigh!!! Just as I was starting to panic about not being able to find the spare pillow for Sam's childcare nap next week, I received one of my worst phone calls of the month: the centre is not ready to start next Monday as planned!!!!!!

Now I'll have one week of childcare-centre-less time to spend with Sam. To entertain him, hopefully teaching him something useful in the meantime & not just that shopping is fun.

Urgh!!!!! And to think that I've rejected an assignment last month in anticipation of next week's Sam-entering-new-school-ruckus!!!!! What a waste of my chance!!!!!

Let's see..........a visit to the library, & then artwork painting. That ought to do the trick for 1 of the 5 weekdays.

Now what should I do for the other 4??????????????

Dunno if I have the energy to bring Sam to the Birdpark on my own........the water playground would be fun for him, provided he doesn't get sunburnt.

Haa! Might as well bring Sam to see the doctor if his nose is still running next week! That's keep him occupied for another morning!

What else......................Help!!!!!!!!!

The Kind of Things U Get in a Birthday Goodie Bag

I know all the enthusiatics mothers who took the trouble to prepare gift packs for their children's classmates in school meant well. But why can't they just include more healthy snacks & less junk?????

Today Sam received yet another elaborately decorated birthday goodie bag from a fellow classmate in his playgroup. Except for the box of Coco Crunch, which is at least a healthy cereal despite of the chocolate intensiveness, there's also a marshmellow sweet, a TimeOut chocolate bar & some savoury biscuits. And a whistle.

Now, I'll rather have more of those party whistles & toys than figure out how to hide the TimeOut chocolate bar from my son, cos I don't usually allow him such titbits. I'm still trying to find a way to get rid of the packet of Twisties from another goodie bag 3 weeks ago. Think I'll just eat that myself & get hubby to devour the TimeOut. The marshmellow sweet I'm reserving to use as a rewarding treat when Sam behaves well.

Don't understand why Singaporean parents tend to give such titbits in the goodies bags. When we were in KL, the expat group of mothers tend to put more party toys in the bags. The snacks they used were healthier too. Sam once received a packet of orange juice even!

Can't wait for Sam to start in the new childcare. At least over there, the centre has guidelines & recommendations for parents to use healthy snacks eg. raisins in the goodie bags.